Diary of a Deviant

The Door Has Been Opened

2011-12-19T10:42:00.000-05:00

I'm hope I get to pleasure both Patty AND a young stud.

In February, Patty and I will be spending a week in Manhattan on business/vacation.

While lounging in bed last Sunday morning, Patty said something about our trip that surprised me.

“I think that while we’re in New York,” she said, “we should find ourselves a boy to play with one night.”

“Really?”

“I think it would be fun. You know? A complete stranger. Just a young guy to play with...”

“He’d have to have a big cock...”

“We’ll, I don’t want you to feel inadequate.”

“I wouldn’t. I would love it, as long as you can handle a big cock.”

“I’ve handled a lot of big cocks honey, I’m just trying to be nice.”

“I want you to have big cock.”

“...but no gay shit.”

“Define gay shit.”

“You guys aren’t going to fuck each other in the ass.”

“I’m fine with that... but what about other things?”

“Like what?”

“Can I help guide his cock into your pussy?”

“Of course.”

“While I guide it in, do you mind if I stroke it a bit?”

“Of course not.”

“Can I eat your pussy while he’s fucking you with that big cock?”

“Yes, please.”

“Is it okay if my mouth touches his cock? You know... accidentally...”

“Well, of course.”

“When it slips out, would it be okay if I cleaned him off with my mouth... maybe sucked it a bit?”

“You wanna suck cock so bad don’t you?”

“Yes...”

“You wanna gag on a fat cock.”

“Yes...”

“Okay... and if you’re a good boy we can find a nice girl for a one night stand too.”

Patty and I decided that the best way to find our Manhattan playmates is an adult personals ad.

Stay tuned.

Here's a link to the video featured in the screencap above!

Last Night We Had An Audiance

2011-12-12T19:36:00.001-05:00

My favorite pastime!

For at least a year now, I have spent a lot of time on a website that randomly pairs webcam users with each other online. I’ve had lots of great cam sex sessions with both guys and girls and it is currently one of my most deviant online pleasures.

This activity has been something that I have kept well hidden from Patty, unsure of how she would react to me getting off with strangers online. Would she consider it cheating?

I decided it would be best to keep her in the dark... until recently.

As part of my efforts to continually push her boundaries, I’ve been trying to come up with a way to introduce her to the website, without letting her in on my secret.

After getting sufficiently wasted at a Christmas party last night, Patty and I came home and started working on a bottle of wine.

It was now or never...

While she was out of the room, I pulled out my laptop and logged on.

I called her in and told her I wanted to show her this crazy website that I found while surfing some porn sites.

She sat off camera and watched a strangers rotated on the screen. There were females and males, some clothed, some nude... and cocks... There were lots and lots of cocks.

At first we just made fun of people appearing on the screen... we talked to a few of them... and made comments about the cocks we saw. We were having a lot of fun... and then it happened...

A young guy, probably in his early 20s, appeared on the screen. The camera was aimed from the waste up. He was chubby, not very attractive and he was wearing a Grateful Dead tee shirt. We stared at each other for a few seconds... Patty was still off screen... and then he asked, “Are you gonna take your cock out?”

“He wants me to take my cock out,” I said, laughing nervously.

“Then take it out for him faggot!”

“Okay,” I said, repositioning the camera and pulling my cock and balls out of my pajamas. I felt a huge adrenaline rush as my flaccid little dick started to come to life. Our cam partner returned the favor by pointing his camera down and pulling out his hairy little dick. To my surprise, Patty leaned over, in view of the camera and swallowed my cock whole.

As she went to town on my cock, our cam partner started stroking for us, obviously excited by our show. I was so turned on knowing that someone was watching Patty deep throat my cock. I think she liked it too, because she would take long pauses and stare straight into the camera, opening her mouth as if to invite his cock inside.

“He and I have the same cock,” I said.

“Yeah you do,” she replied. “Small.”

I got all tingly hearing her call my cock small.

“Yeah,” I said, “and with two tiny cocks, you could easily fit both of them in your mouth at the same time.”

“Oh yeah? You’d like that? Your little dicks rubbing together in my mouth?”

“Oh God yes,” I said as she started to suck again.

Unfortunately, our cam friend couldn’t handle all of the tiny dick faggot talk because he made a mess all over himself and then disconnected.

Immediately, Patty shut off, moved to the side again and I shoved my throbbing wet cock back into my pajamas.

We cruised through about twenty more strangers until we happened upon another young guy (probably in his early 20s).

His camera only allowed us to see him from the neck down. He was totally naked, leaning back on a couch... and he was totally fucking hot. Obviously, the guy worked out. He had an athletic, muscular build and a nice big cock. He was easily 7 inches.

Patty leaned in to get a closer look.

“Now that’s a real man,” she said, eying him up and down.

Upon seeing Patty’s face on cam, the stranger asked, “Are you guys gonna play with me?”

Patty gave no response, but immediately pulled my cock back out and began to suck it. Again, she attentively watched our cam partner while he stroked his cock.

“She’s not paying enough attention to me,” the stranger complained.

With that, Patty pulled my cock from her mouth and instructed me to remove my bottoms.

She stood up and removed all of her clothing. She stood in front of the camera, showing our partner her naked body, and sat down on my cock.

As she bounced up and down on top of me, she never said a word, she just continued watching him stroke hid huge cock. I imagine she was wishing that she was riding him instead of me and I think he knew it.

I kicked the coffee table away from us and bent her over. As I started fucking her from behind I could see what our partner was seeing... her fat tits bouncing up and down... the look of pleasure on her face while I fiercely fucked her dripping wet pussy.

“This is unreal,” the stranger said just before he busted a huge white load all over his chest. With that, I pushed the table away further and pushed Patty down on all fours, holding her head to the floor as I continued to fuck her. Our partner had already disconnected, but neither of us cared.

I pulled my cock from inside of her and with one stroke I sprayed my own huge load all over her back and her ass.

It felt really great to be watched... now if we can just get Patty to make this happen in person!

The “Shared Cock” Fantasy

2011-12-05T17:41:00.000-05:00

Patty sometimes placates my desire for dick by shoving Marty down my throat. Although she says it turns her on to watch me gag on a fat cock, I often wonder if its just a game meant to keep me from seeking the real thing.

Now, I’m not so sure.

On Friday night, I was able to take my shared cock fantasy to the next level.

Patty and I were pretty wasted and very horny. While she brushed her teeth, I opened the laptop next to our bed, turned on a gangbang scene from my vast bookmark collection, cranked the volume and waited naked in our bed.

Patty loves porn. She watches it both with me and without me and she’s one of the few girls I know who masturbates to porn.

Her favorite genre is the gangbang.

She says that she loves watching a slut get used by multiple guys and the moaning and screaming associated with being annihilated by multiple big cocks turns her on. When it comes to her fetishes though, Patty contradicts herself. Patty clearly loves gangbangs, but swears that she would never want her fantasy to become reality.

I’m not so sure that I believe her.

Just like I refuse to tell her point blank that I love cock, I suspect that Patty is hesitant to tell me that, deep down, she wants to be ravaged by a group of men.

About 20 minutes into our session, Patty was on all fours and I was pounding her from behind. I looked over at the scene we were watching and saw the skinny little bitch on screen in the same position, getting pounded just as hard. The only difference was that her mouth was also getting fucked by a huge cock.

That’s when I had an idea.

By now, Patty is usually in control, riding me and shoving Marty down my throat.

This time, I would turn the tables.

I shoved my cock in as deep as I could and stayed there as I leaned over and pulled Marty from the bedside table. I pressed Patty’s head into the pillow and put Marty to her lips.

“I think its your turn to suck this cock,” I whispered into her ear.

She willingly opened her mouth wide and I shoved Marty in deep. Her gag reflex pushed him out, almost immediately, covering him in spit and phlegm.

Pulling the wet cock from my hands she whimpered, “Just fuck me.”

This is a screenshot from my favorite amateur video, featuring a married couple sharing a cock at the glory hole. There is a link to the clip at the end of this post.

As I lifted my grip from the back of her head, she began to take care of Marty herself, worshiping the six-inch dick like the nasty cocksucker she is. Of course, this turned me on like crazy and I rewarded her by fucking her soaking wet pussy as hard as I could, fucking her so hard that my balls began to ache.

“You love sucking that big cock while I fuck you, don’t you?”

“Mm,” she said, too busy to stop and talk.

“Tell me you love sucking that cock,” I ordered.

“Mm,” she said and popped the head from her mouth, slurping up her own spit. “I love sucking big cock while you fuck me.”

I continued to shove myself inside of her, becoming more violent with each stroke. But she was so wet that I knew my little cock wasn’t doing its job as it swam inside her dripping hole.

“I want it inside of me,” she moaned.

“You want what inside of you,” I asked, insisting that she satisfy my need to be her dirty little-dick cuck.

“Big cock,” she said. “I want a big cock inside of me.”

I nearly shot my load right there, my body tingling from her admission.

This was yet another first for us. Aside from ending my reign as Marty’s sole cocksucker, this marked one of only a few times she allowed Marty to penetrate her and the first time she asked for it.

She explains her resistance to fucking Marty by noting his size, in comparison to me.

“I’m doing it for you,” she says. “To keep my pussy the right fit for your dick. I don’t want anything inside of me that is bigger than you, because it will take away from your pleasure.”

It seems she has finally come around and accepts the fact that I’d rather see her take pleasure in a big cock rather than work feverishly to try and satisfy her with my little dick, which I can never do.

After I climbed off, she rolled onto her back, legs spread, and shoved Marty balls deep into her pussy. As I lay next to her, watching her take pleasure from him, I couldn’t help but stroke my cock.

“It feels so good having a big cock inside my pussy,” she whispered as Marty steadily fucked her hole.

With those words, my dick erupted.

At this point, Patty pulled the cock from her pussy, brought it back to her lips and began to masturbate with her right hand. This is how we end all of our sessions, because I’m not equipped to make her cum.

As she played with her pussy, she continued worshiping Marty with her mouth. This time, however, I was only inches from her face, getting an up-close view as she carefully licked and sucked every inch.

To my surprise, she paused and whispered, “I want you to suck on this big dick with me baby.”

I leaned in and together we started sucking Marty off, intermittently kissing and making out, as he slid between our lips and from one mouth to the other.

It was the first time we sucked a cock together.

This went on for a while as Patty continued to masturbate feverishly.

Unfortunately (another first in our relationship) she never came.

This has me wondering again. Did she dislike the experience so much that she couldn’t cum or was she just nervous because we opened doors that had previously been closed?

I pray that it is the latter and that we have made our way into the hallway that leads to bringing my deepest fantasies to life.

As promised, here is a link to a great amateur video clip of a couple sharing a cock at the glory hole. It was the original inspiration for my current gloryhole fantasy.

The Current State of Affairs

2011-12-01T21:07:00.005-05:00

Before I can share my stories, I believe that it is important to explain exactly where I am right now.

I currently share a home with my girlfriend Patty.

Patty is an intense woman who struggles with emotional problems and alcohol addiction. I love Patty and, surprisingly, I have been more faithful to her that any other woman thus far. Since she came into my life I have not been with another woman. I have however, unbeknownst to her, had two sexual encounters with men. Both were one-shot deals and both were with strangers.

I believe that my ability to stay committed to one female can be attributed to both Patty’s incredibly sexual nature, as well as her ability to accept the fetishes that I have been willing to share with her.

Although I have never told Patty that I am a bisexual, I believe that she knows.

Patty has always known about my toy collection, which includes two large dildos. Although she isn’t too keen on using them herself, she has become increasingly comfortable with using them on me. One of our most common sexual practices consists of her shoving a dildo down my throat while she’s riding me.

“Suck that dick bitch.” she’ll say as I gag on the six-inch dong. “I wanna see you suck that fucking cock.”

This is Marty, my oldest and most favorite toy. He was originally purchased as a gift for my ex-wife while we were still dating. Since then, he has seen a lot of different pussies!

We tend to only use the dildos when we are both sufficiently drunk, though I have started to see her become more accepting of my sexuality over time, even when sober. Although she has very strong opinions about sexuality and monogamy, I believe that I am close to unlocking a door to someone who may be more sexually adventurous than she seems. Only time will tell, I suppose.

Although I have not been with any other women since Patty came along, I have had a few secret “relationships” which have been purely platonic, but have had the potential to become more. Aside from that, Patty does not realize that I spend two to four hours a day looking at porn, posting photos and videos of myself online and participating in cam sex online.

Lately, Patty has been calling me a “faggot” and a “queer” during normal everyday situations. Part of me thinks that perhaps it is a defense mechanism against my apparent bisexuality, though I pray that it means that she is becoming more comfortable with who I am. I would love nothing more than to be able to bring her on my next trip to the glory hole and suck a big hard cock right in front of her.

Only time will tell, I suppose.

Wanna know more about us? Click here.